Mairéad Molloy Doyle Relationship Psychologist & Strategist
Relationship Maintenance
The best relationships take a lot of work and that work is mostly about good communication, both verbal and nonverbal. Even when couples try to talk to each other, many make the mistake of comparing what each brings to and receives from the relationship as a measuring stick which can result in one or both partners feeling unappreciated. This common practice also applies to a relationship that enjoys equal footing leaving one side often feeling neglected or that the balance is wrong. This is when things can go wrong and, if not addressed, snowball out of control - jealousy, avoidance, spying, cheating, destructive conflict, - the negatives kick in, sometimes to the point of no return.
To engage in positive behaviour and avoid the negative, we try to identify what behaviours, in individuals and couples, that can help encourage better (or new ways to) communicate so to facilitate a positive and proactive environment which gets the best out of both partners.
While there is often common ground, these positive behaviours are different for everyone. Some examples include:
Assurances, Openness, Positivity, Shared Tasks, Social Networks - by Social Networks I do not mean social media but rather spending time with, and gathering support from, shared friends.
Easy to say, often harder to make work. Once identified and agreed as a mutually beneficial fit, engaging with these, and other, types of behaviours will promote relationship satisfaction and mutual commitment, allowing love to thrive.